I have to imagine the most eligible of bachelors will cringe when they read this (and for that matter the bachelorettes too), but I have a confession to make. Here it goes: I’m married and I don’t have a bank account to call my own. There I said it.
I’ve always felt that the only way a marriage can really work is if both partners come in 50/50. By 50/50 I don’t mean matching your spouse dollar for dollar, but rather there has to be some sense of “ours.” At the end of the day, both husband and wife should have as much to lose as they have to gain — unless you’re Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey or some shit, in that case, a pre-nup is in order.
As far as wifey and I go, we came up together. We started out broke. Our first dates were matinees and a romantic dinner was having to split an order of chicken wings and vegetable fried rice. We pretty much had nothing. We were each living with our parents, going to school full-time and working full-time jobs. I’d save my money, she’d save hers and I must admit we were pretty focused. Then one day she won like $500 from a Lottery Scratchie, which when you’re 17 years-old, is a lot of paper. So we took her winnings and our separate savings and stashed it in the mattress, literally. The goal was to save up enough dough to get our own apartment and we did in a matter of months.
Once we got the apartment we needed a more civilized way to save our chavo. So instead of hiding green stacks like a couple of Bed-Stuy crack slingers, we decided to pool our collective income and create a joint bank account. We were movements by ourselves but a force together.
Now having a joint account with a girl you aren’t married too is risky move because when it comes to dough a lot of ya’ll chicks are shifty. Then again so are most men so I guess we’re even (see my aforementioned notes on 50/50).
Regardless of what anyone thought, it worked for us. Eventually we were able to save up for a car, an engagement ring and eventually the wedding. If I would’ve known what I know now, I’d save on the wedding and cop a house. We had a few financial ups and downs but the important thing is we went through it together. If she took a loss, that meant we both took a loss. If I lost my job, then we were both in trouble. But on the flip side, let’s say she got a Christmas bonus, then we’re both ballin’!
I know the singles set would advise against this, especially the ballers and the independent woman that Beyoncé and Carrie Bradshaw bred. But to hell with ya’ll, it worked for me and the misses. To this day we only have the joint accounts. And while we do squabble over various things, we’ve never ever had a fight over money. Not once! Maybe because with the house, the car and two kids and the occasional Dooney bag, we’re both broke. But hey, for better or worse right?
-Al “Brooklyn” Bundy
Want more Bundy? Check out his previous posts here.
Currently Listening: “Money Can’t Buy You Love” – Ralph Tresvant