When Holiday Swinging Goes Wrong

holiday swinging

Being on holiday does something weird to the mind of the Brits…. especially when they’re holidaying in Europe. Not only do they shout in English at the Spanish/French/Italians thinking it works as some kind of translation tool, but they also seem to lose their sexual inhibitions.

Spain’s a fun place to go clubbing for a week, there are so many Brits there it’s a bit like raving at home but with constant sunshine and a fabulous beach. But many a times I’ve ended up chilling at night on a beach after clubbing, only to then have a couple of Brits start having sex in the sand in front of everyone. Or there was the time when it happened on a sun lounger next to a friend of mine…. or the time when a bar we were in suddenly turned into one huge swingers club (so we made a swift exit).

It annoys the Spanish loads (well not the men so much)… but they only have to put up with it for a few months a year, then their lives go back to normal. British girls are known for their — shall we say — loose morals on the Med. Mostly because they drink too much and that’s when trouble starts.

But the thing is that the Europeans are used to it and turn a blind eye. Not so in other holiday destinations like Dubai, where two Brits have been arrested and face up to six years in jail after being caught at it on a beach. Vince Acors (known as “Vince Charming” cos of his way with the ladies — I kid you not), was on a business trip last week and met Michelle Palmer. They got absolutely trolleyed, and ended up doing it on the beach — but got caught, and arrested. You see the problem isn’t so much that they were getting busy on the beach, it was because they’re not married…

Dubai’s beautiful, and a great holiday destination. But I suspect fewer Brits will be holidaying there in the future. No sex on the beach?! Well that’s just not British.

—Miss London Party

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