This past weekend, the fellas were in the barbershop just talkin’ shit like we normally do. For a dude, the shop is one of the last sacred spots where men can simply be men. Not that we are on some fake shit when we’re at home, but do our significant others really want to hear a debate on who has the fattest ass- Kim Kardashian or Serena Williams? Of course not.
So like it often does, the subject at the shop turned to Halle Berry; then someone brought up how ex-hubby David Justice used to beat on her (I dunno was this ever confirmed?). Then someone brought up Lisa Raye’s current domestic violence situation. Then the conversation turned to a long and laborious, “When is OK to hit a woman?”
For me, the answer is never. Now I know to never say never, but I just can’t see a situation arising where I would lay a hand on my wife.
“What if you caught her cheating,” said one dude.
“Then I’d fuck dude up,” I responded, “and then leave her.”
“What if she hit you,” another asked.
“Then I’d leave before shit escalated further.”
Yes, I know it is easier said then done, but I feel like if I ever felt like shit was so bad that I had to hit wifey, that means the relationship is pretty much over and its time to move on anyway. Still, I’ve never been put in a situation that bad, so I guess this is all hypothetical. Some of the dudes in the shop (it was about 10 of us) called me out and said I was full of shit, which led me to believe that they condoned knocking their woman upside the head. Two cats even admitted to hitting their women and just chalked it up to some shit they had to do.
I, for one, have a very strong-minded wife who I don’t believe would put up with that shit. And on the flipside, I wouldn’t allow her to lay a hand on me either. Fuck that! But it just amazes me how many women wind up battered wives. Now, my dad has never hit my moms, but in her first marriage (before my dad) my mom was abused. Even though the shit went down before I was born, I absolutely hated my mom’s ex for the permanent emotional damage he caused her.
During my cousin’s funeral several years back, the entire family gathered at a wake and guess who shows up? My mom’s ex-husband. Well, dude thought it was appropriate to make a joke about his nuts in front of my mother (with me standing RIGHT there). I just snapped, grabbed dude by the neck and started wailing on him, until a few family members broke it up. It got pretty ugly. I won’t front, now that I think about it wasn’t the joke that set me off, but it was all the years of abuse that my mother suffered which drove me crazy. I could have let the joke go, but I didn’t want to. Now there I was, at about 21 years old, beating on this dude in his 50’s. It was hardly a fair fight, but then again neither was him versus mom dukes so fuck itâ€¦
**To Be Continued**
-Al â€œBrooklynâ€ Bundy
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