Not sure if you heard, but there is a recession creeping across America and aside from the middle Americans who have foreclosed on their homes, that single mother who lost her job and canâ€™t feed her kids or the college kid who is no longer getting financial aid, single women are suffering. If you are unwed, unattached and out on the dating scene, like myself, you may have noticed something is amiss. Walk past any nice restaurant between the hours of 6-10pm and youâ€™ll find empty seats. Youâ€™re out to dinner with your girls and you notice that there are several tables filled with girls just like yourselves, laughing, sharing plates, or mixed pairs but mostly parties of 3 or more. No, your mind isnâ€™t playing tricks on you. The dinner date is dead!
I began noticing the extinction of dinner as a early stage date option mid-summer. I kept hearing the words â€œCoffee Dateâ€ or â€œLets meet for coffeeâ€. For one, I do not drink coffee; have never felt tempted to drink coffee nor do I find the inside of a Starbuckâ€™s charming. In fact they all have faint aroma of homelessness and laptop dust. Still, my friends and I wondered what is this about. I asked the men and the explanation wasâ€¦well it wasâ€¦
â€œItâ€™s a recession and I need to know that you have real potential before I come up off $75, $100 for dinner.â€
Looky here, if you think you can take two hours of my time to ask me all types of personal questions while I sip on some hot shit I donâ€™t want while my stomach is doing cartwheels cause I hotfooted it over here on my lunch break for coffee, you have another thing coming.
Letâ€™s do the math:
1 cup of coffee/tea/fancy fruity shit = $4.79
Time spent in coffee shop, talking = 2 hours
Cost of travel to and from coffee date = $4.00 (on public transportation in NYC)
$4.79 / 2 hours + $4.00 â€“ the chances of you seeing me again = Youâ€™re a cheap bastard
I can understand being on a budget but you mean to tell me that somewhere between paying $4.79 for a vente Kujichagulia and $40 per person for dinner, you canâ€™t find a nice eatery that will cost you $30 for the whole shabang? Chinese? Thai? BBQ (not BBQâ€™s the hood chain spot with the steroid chicken wings)? These types of food donâ€™t cost $75 for two. Be inventive and find places with charm and good food. Understand that good doesnâ€™t have to mean gourmet.
Dinner isnâ€™t the end all be all and you not offering it to us as option no. 1 on the â€œLetâ€™s Hang Outâ€ list isnâ€™t a deal breaker (for most). It does, however, hinder the process. Dinner shows a woman that you are prepared to provide for her. You can work and bring home the (turkey) bacon.
Taking a woman out to dinner is the modern day version of a caveman bringing home a kill: â€œLook sweetie, look what I slayed for you today in the wilderness. Are you proud of me? Did I make you happy? Are you impressed?â€
Taking a woman out for coffee says: â€œIâ€™d fuck you.â€
Iâ€™m all for making sure you know a person and if you really want to pursue them. But to place a womanâ€™s value on whether she is worth a meal after 6pm is insulting. Not to mention with women having the balls to approach you dudes you shouldnâ€™t be surprised if when you offer dinner at the end of the meal she picks up the tab.
People, Iâ€™m just merely suggesting that men stop thinking with their egoâ€™s and realize that we women know that there is a recession. You can look at our nails and see weâ€™ve been skipping on our manicure appointments (ladies, no matter how bad it getsâ€¦never skip the feet. Iâ€™ll eat ramen noodles for a week in order to pay for a pedicure, oh and my eyebrows too!) Gentlemen, we ladies promise not to lock up the coochie, or think less of you if you want to take us to Chiliâ€™s or Red Lobster for the â€œAll You Can Eat Shrimpâ€ special.
A real woman will ride with you during these hard fiscal times.
â€”Says the Single Girl
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