I’m Taking The Kids

I won’t front, I got a ton of pride. One of my negative qualities is the inability to let go of it. In arguments, I hold on to my angst even when I’m wrong because my pride won’t let me admit my fault. But pride isn’t all bad. When I look at my life, the thing that makes me most proud are my kids: my two sons.

Over the weekend, while wifey and I were joking (I know a lot of truth is said in jest, but trust me- we were just joking) and playfully fighting, I tell her that if she keeps it up I will leave and never come back. Then I put the nail in the coffin, “and I’m taking the kids!” She just laughed at me. “You wouldn’t last a day as a single dad, you’ll bring ’em back in 24 hours,” she said laughing.

So I thought about it, and my pride just won’t let me do let someone else take care of my kids. If the chips were down, if I had to do it alone, I’d be a terrific dad. As my wife and I joke about this hypothetical scenario, I am reminded of my best friend who is actually going through this in real life. He has two kids, two baby mamas (both of them equally crazy and I’m not being biased, these broads are nutso) and told me that he plans to fight them both for custody. Now usually custody battles favor the mother (now ain’t them some sexiest shit), but both of his baby mamas are so screwed up, my boy could win a moral victory for all dads across the world.

I just couldn’t imagine a split from wifey at all. Even though she bugs me and complains a lot, something-something-something, she’s all I got (shout to Jimmy Cozier). But, as much as it would kill me to live a life without the wife, it would absolutely destroy me to live a life without my sons. Now I know you guys are thinking, “Bundy what about joint custody.” No, that just won’t do; I need to see my boys everyday. It kills me when I come home late from work and my oldest is already sleeping, sometimes I just wanna wake him up and hear about his day. And God forbid we split, wifey gets re-hitched and another man helps raise ’em… that won’t work at all!

So just to be safe, if the shit goes down; I’m taking the kids. You heard it here first.

-Al “Brooklyn” Bundy

Want more Bundy? Check out his previous posts here.

Last 5 posts by Parlour

  • GuywithGlasses

    I feel you son. I just hope and pray you never actually have to go through that situation (and that wifey doesn’t read this also).

  • for the record, most custody hearings go in favor of the mother because usually she is the primary caregiver. in cases where the mother is not fit, fathers can get custody only if they show up and are informed. a lot of times, kids end up in fostercare unnecessarily because when the children are removed from their mother’s care, the father could not be explored as an option because he wasn’t involved at all or minimally. both parents need to be actively involved regardless of the court ruling. that means, make sure that your name is on the birth certificate. get the paternity test (pay for it yourself if you have to)to remove doubt and side-step a lot of the nonsense. make sure that you’re listed as a contact on the school records so you can stay abreast of your child’s educational & social development(if you’re not the custodial parent unless there is an order of protection). make sure that there is a vistation schedule in place and stick to it, even if that means meeting at a public place or having an unbiased third party act as a go-between. unfortunately, most men say that “the system” is against them and don’t even try. responsibility extends way beyond child support payments.

    but, yes, things happen and relationships fall apart but a lot of the mess that men like your friend go through is because they ignored the signs and chose to deal with crazy women. i doubt they just started acting crazy.

  • i 2nd asha’s emotion. been down that road and most dudes will talk that talk but can’t/won’t walk the walk (aka being involved beyond the child support payments, weekly 4 hr visit & random phone call to say hi to the kids)

    i know lots of dudes who felt the same way you do al, yet when shit hit the fan found out that love the emotion (i love my kids with all my heart) and love the action(i gotta find a way to provide and care for these kids all day, every day) are two completely different things. and most find the latter too much to handle.