Sex Drive: When Making Him Wait Sucks

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I’ve been seeing the same dude for about five months.  We’ve been having a really fun time getting to know each other.  Our first few months were filled with early mornings of the two of us staring at each other in the cool dark light, memorizing the way the other’s nose curves and lips curl.  We waited a reasonable amount of time before we began having sex.  And while it seemed like a longish time (because our friends kept asking us when we were gonna do it already) we’ve recently reached a point in our relationship where we realized that we may have rushed into things and need to slow down.  So upon my suggestion we’re not having sex, because we obviously had some things to work out and sex always muddies the waters.  The problem is, he is really sexy and I am really horny.

Obviously, I don’t want to be the one to break down first.  We always hear about women who hold out when their men are not “acting right.”  Who are these women?! I would really like to know why it’s so easy for them.  I was fine with making him wait for it before we engaged in intercourse the first time, but now that we’ve gone there I’m finding it difficult to go back.  And the longer this goes on (three weeks so far) the more I want to sit on it!

The problem is, this time around, I’m determined to hold out until he’s dying to have it.  As for now, he is uncomfortably OK with the situation.  So, I think it’s going to take a while to crack him.

How do I keep my cool until he gets hot? Any suggestions ladies?

Last 5 posts by Bobbi

  • Joelle

    HAH!! Good luck!! I got nothin’…. well maybe that’s not true… You know maybe you should seriously take advantage of this time to get yourself refocused on the relationship and what you love about him and what you love, like, and don’t care for in the relationship… Is he someone you could see yourself caring for -for the rest of your life? Things like that. The minute you take the focus off of him and his “Uncomfortable” capabilities to “hold out” the minute he will begin to start to want you more. This never fails the woman begins caring for herself the man starts getting himself together and wants her more… Classic case! So with that said… GODD LUCK!!!

  • Not F’n Either

    I’m in a very similar predicament. It’s a challenge but not impossible. During this time you should alter the state of your relationship. Deviate from the usual ‘let’s go back to my place.” Instead, go to a mutual friend’s house, take a walk, part ways, but avoid spending quiet, intimate time alone. If it becomes too much of a challenge you should talk to him about it, it seems like you’re playing a game and if you’re serious about your situation with this man then you should reevaluate your stance. Best wishes and I hope the d*ck is worth it.

  • sol

    My advice…SIT ON IT.

  • Devo

    I know you were asking for comments from women but I find this interesting. Simply because I have been put through the waiting situation. So I have to ask is he a big sports fan? How often does he hangout with his buddies? The longer you make him wait the more time away from you is where you’ll find him. You said he is good looking or sexy. Unless he is different from about 95 percent of us he will get it somewhere else. My suggestion is go jump his bones at lunch time then see how he treats you that evening. Good Luck I hope you lose.