“True Blood” Recap: “I’m Not Gonna Do Anything Stupid”

Daphne true blood

You know what it is ladies, the “True Blood” recap here at Parlour, where we talk about: Sam not asking Daphne if she has any diseases, specifically that komodo dragon rash that’s been going around…We’re still not sure why Maryann won’t leave Tara alone, and we’re salty that we didn’t get to see Eggs’ behind this week. Boo. But there’s more!

-“I’m completely yours…I’m not gonna do anything stupid.” -sez Sookie. Why doesn’t she understand that the Dallas vamps will eat her as soon as see her?

-Such a nerd, really? That guy’s going to tell Jessica about his comic books? How OLD is he?

-The one-handed push ups from Jason doing the Jesus (literal) bootcamp? Lol!

-The cg’d-to-high-heaven photo of Tara, Sookie and Gran rears its ugly head again… I hate that thing…

-Lafeyette’s over-done make-up and beaded scarf…I. Can’t. But I’m so glad that he’s back!

-Word to the Tony Chachere’s seasoning that Maryanne was using in the kitchen while gangstering Tara for a place to stay…

-“That’s family tara” -sez Eggs. (Sorry homes, I don’t think you don’t have sex w/ family, right?)

-What’s the great revelation the first Dallas vampire was talking about with Eric, Sookie, Bill & the argumentative Spanish vamp?

-“I’ve got her even when I don’t want her” -sez televangelist man. Oh, please!

true blood_jason

-Was that a bazooka that the Televangelist handed Jason was holding in the vampire war/prayer closet?

-“God wants you to have your reward, let me give you your reward …help you find your way back to joy” -sez televangelist wife. RUN JASON!

-“Nice rack” -sez Sam. “Nice balls” -sez Daphne/deer. (While doing it on a pool table…CHEESE)

PREDICTIONS:

-Sookie and Jason are totally going to cross paths and I think that she’ll realize she’s at Jason’s haven by reading the televangelist’s wife’s mind…whatcha think?

-WOAH, Bill having his female maker around is going to ruffle Sookie’s feathers, throwing a wrench in the whole, ‘it’s just me and you’ thing…

What were your fave parts!?!

Last 5 posts by Hillary Crosley

  • Dionne

    How crazy was it at the end when Bill’s maker was walking through the hall. Is Bill obligated to give Sookie up to her? And being from Texas I love Tony Chachere’s believe me I stock up on it every time I go home. If New Yorkers only knew about that seasoning, it would change their lives.

  • – is it me or does Sookie have the worst style ever?

    – I’m really mad that Maryann felt the need to throw on an apron and house dress when Tara got home. And spell or no spell, new ass doesn’t mean u let people live in a hous that is NOT yours.

    – I’m almost ready for Sookie to get a sound whoopin from someone, and it just may be Bills maker.

    So I’m in Spain right now and tell me why my neighbor, who is American, was geeked to find out about fastpass.tv, he heard my computer this morning, recognized the theme song and straight lnoled on the door! Trueblood is everywhere!!!!

  • re: maryann in the house dress, i thought it was gran’s clothes and she was using it as a way of making tara feel more homey with her. and yes, that pic of tara, sookie & gran is waaay creepy. i keep expecting to see gran move in the pic.

    while lafayette’s make-up and beaded scarf were overdone, his personality usually matches it. poor la. he was so quiet. i wonder what’s going to help him work through his trauma. maybe another hit of v, no? but this time, no h-town/pretty ricky dancing. and i hope he doesn’t get hooked.

    i think hoyt’s interaction with jessica is sweet. watching tv together over the phone or talking on the phone until one or both of them fall asleep is very jr. high school/high school and given their backgrounds, very appropriate. if hoyt was age-appropriate, he wouldn’t be living at home with his domineering mother. this relationship with jessica hopefully will help him grow up. unfortunately, his mother may become jessica’s victim ala natural born killers.

    the great revelation was the vampires’ coming out, after true blood as manufactured in japan.

    my prediction: the preacher’s wife is going to share what she knows about the secret goings-on at the church with jason to get closer to him. it will also incidentally save sookie once she finds out that the church has him and then her cover is blown, more than likely by jason’s former bunkmate.

    and tara’s mother is going to save her from maryanne. either she’s going to reveal a family secret (that’s why she was plagued by that demon and ms. janette said that tara had something strong in her) or her death at maryann’s hands is going to wake tara up.

  • I don’t know about you, but I finished last night’s show mad and frustrated. Where is all of this going? Maryanne is starting to really annoy me and there are no signs of anyone waking up and realizing that this chick is wrecking havoc all over town. I just wish someone would shake Tara out of her dick-whipped trance and help her use the common sense that she clearly has more than anyone else on the show. As smart as she is–why couldn’t she see through Maryanne’s apron-wearing switch up AFTER she told her ass to leave?

    Also, clearly Sookie is going to be stuck in Dallas longer than planned. Just long enough for Maryanne to plant more seeds in Gran’s house and fu** things up even more. I think her fellow telepath is part of the crazy evangelist group and is going to give her up. Especially since she conveniently suggested he “make money with his gifts”, as she has seen with her “new boyfriend.” What an idiot!

  • i would have run awy for sookie myself. she sounded like she was pitching amway.

  • I thought it was really cute that Hoyt was reading comic books to Jessica over the phone. I love that her innocence is still, in a way, being preserved even though everything has changed for her. Hoyt is perfect for her and I love it everytime they are on screen together.

    This episode made me mad, I really do not care about Tara, Eggs, Maryann anymore. I do not see any need to check back in with them. But obviously Eggs was in on Maryann’s sympathy act. It was him who had the moment with Tara when she was talking about how much Gran meant to her. He said that he and Maryann & Carl take care of each other, so manipulating Tara aint a thing for him.

    Trueblood is losing stream. They spent entirely too much time with Sookie & Bill this episode. I want more Godric, Eric, Lafayette, and Jason.

  • Sookie got on my nerves this ep! She keeps acting like she can take care of herself. Oh really? Didn’t you almost get killed by Rene? Didn’t you get slashed all down your back and poisoned? Didn’t you almost get jacked by however many vamps before Bill had to be on that “She’s Mine” crap?
    She’s so annoying.

    I still love Jason to pieces. I wish he had more willpower but you can only expect so much when a woman is rolling up on you in the tub I guess.

    I really hope that the shape-shifters keep their love confined to human form. It’ll be too much even for HBO if the dog tries to mount the doe!

  • Steely D

    @KiaJD “Mount the doe” = LOL!

  • Finally watched this last night. Still freaked out by that awful picture; I can’t even look at it anymore. It scares me!

    So sad to see Lafayette beaten down; worried about what the vamps are going to do to him, cause next week’s preview shows them making him sell V again.

    Love Jessica and Hoyt together. He’s always had a fascination with vampires—remember when he ordered a True Blood in the first season? I think it’s sweet.

    I don’t think Daphne is a shape shifter. I think she’s something else, and she can absorb powers, or that’s just one of her powers. Why? Because she is the only one who didn’t die (or almost die) from Maryanne’s scratches. And she kept asking Sam questions about his power, then saying hers was the same. “How does it feel when you change?…Yeah, same here.” I think she was sent to get close to Sam.

    I knew Bill’s maker was coming back this episode, cause they showed her making him on the recap at the beginning. I also knew that Godric had to be Eric’s maker; cause that’s the only reason he would care so much. Also, the exchange between the two of them spoke right to my post this week (Vampire Pride), “Could you see yourself being my companion through all eternity? I’ll be your brother, your father, your brother.” The only thing he left out was “your lover.”

    Eggs is def in on this with Maryanne; I wasn’t sure before, but that little pissy speech he gave confirmed it. Pissed at Maryanne in Gran’s apron, and mad at Tara for being so stupid when she clearly is NOT stupid.

  • Nikki

    How Crazy is that photo!