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The Parlour Guide to the Hottest World Cup Players, Pt. 1

In addition to being the resident arty-chick of the Parlour trifecta, I’m also our unofficial soccer football expert. Blame it on my fanatical ex-boyfriend, constant travel addiction, love of accents and the bevy of hotties. Seriously, football has the highest number of cute guys of any sport. Most are fine and fit, since you have to be in great shape to run the pitch (field) for nearly two hours. The game is insanely simple to understand, follow and even easier to play, making football one of the world’s greatest equalizers. So as we enter into the second weekend of World Cup madness, get familiar with my favorite sport through some visual goodness (read: pretty menses) from around the globe.

We’ll begin with the United States, Brasil and Cameroon:

TEAM USA:

above: Edson Buddle | Current Team: LA Galaxy | Age: 29 | Nice guy hot.

Oguchi Onyewu | Current Team: AC Milan | Age: 28 | Rough me up (a little) hot. Gucci! [DMV stand-up!]

Clint Dempsey | Current Team: Fulham | Age: 27 | Nice guy next door until you get him angry hot.


TEAM BRASIL

Robson de Souza aka Robinho | Current Team: Santos FC | Age: 26 | Thumb-sucking hot.
no really, he sucks his thumb…on the pitch (field).

Felipe Melo | Current Team: Juventus | Age: 26 | Looks like my little brother hot.

Kaká aka Ricardo Izecson dos Santos Leite | Current Team: Read Madrid | Age: 28 | Loves Jesus hot.


TEAM CAMEROON

Samuel Eto’o | Current Team: Internazionale | Age: 29 | Stuntin’ on all you Italian haters hot.

Joel Matip | Current Team: Schalke 04 | Age: 18 | Barely legal hot.

Up next: Portugal, Ivory Coast & England – Cheers Ladies!

Last 5 posts by Shannon Washington

  • thank you for giving me the world cup highlights, lol.

  • Fa

    World Cup is International Fine Man sports spectacular.