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‘Dominatrix Diaries’ Explores Hidden Sexual Fantasies

Julie Simone of the Dominatrix Diaries

The photo to your left may look a bit “American Horror Story” but it’s with good reason. An enterprising black female director named Chelsea Downs has created an intriguing documentary about bondage and discipline (B&D or B/D), dominance and submission (D&S or D/s), and sadism and masochism (S&M or S/M), commonly known as BDSM and all that it entails from the domme and the dominated perspectives. Ready to explore more than missionary? We’ll let Ms. Downs take it from here. 

Not all of us are comfortable enough in our own sexual curiosities. Sexual shame is a huge obstacle for most people. There are far too many people in the world that want to keep sex in the bedroom with the doors closed, locked and forgotten about until they are in the proverbial mood. I’ve always been drawn to sexuality. I was raised on MTV and HBO so it’s so no surprise that sub-cultures and identity intrigue me.

Five years ago, in the heart of Manhattan, a friend introduced me to a sub-culture of pro-dommes. I was like a kid in a candy store — lust, fantasies and role play — I was hooked. I started learning more and wanted to share that with the world so Dominatrix Diaries was born. It was initially intended to be a TV series. I wanted to create a show that would talk about sex work head-on. Often times, on television, sex work is defined at escorting or exotic dancing; I think that it’s important to see that sex work and sex workers are more diverse than popular rhetoric. Making this documentary has even allowed for me to explore my own sexuality and I’ve learned that everything, absolutely everything is worth a try.

I’d like people to not only understand and explore their own sexuality, but be open to others as well. Going into this project there were some fetishes I hadn’t heard of just didn’t understand. For example the armpit fetish, I can’t say that armpits are my thing but I have a much better understanding of why people find them so appealing. Working on this project has made me think about why some fetishes strike such a cord within me, like adult babies.

Samantha Grace dominating Rik

In making this movie, I’ve gotten to hear some of the best tales I’ve heard in my life. One of the greatest involved a kidnapping, it was one of my subject’s fantasies and he asked to be taken by surprise. He knew it was coming during a month’s time but didn’t know when. He was abducted on the way home from work at knifepoint on the streets of Brooklyn by two dommes. They put him in a van and drove around to disorient him, then brought him to an apartment, stripped him naked and took his phone and wallet. They ordered Chinese food and  “tortured” him, threatening to call his friends and family for ransom money. When the food arrived they invited the deliver guy inside the apartment to witness the humiliation. Later that night, he ate their leftovers and walked home.

In Dominatrix Dairies you’ll see people that have the courage to live out their fantasies and women that have come forward as sex workers to share their side of the story. Most people probably don’t recognize or realize the training that goes into being a good domme. You have to know where and with which instrument to hit someone so that it is pleasurable and does not leave a mark. People are confused about what exactly dommes do. Maybe they’ve watched a clip on the Internet or read an article but they still don’t know what to expect in a session.

Andriana sitting on hooded man

Making this documentary has been an incredible learning experience for me. More so than in any other project, I’ve learned to really value my interviewees. People welcomed me into their homes and shared honestly about their feelings and desires, there was a general willingness amongst the professional dominatrices.

It’s not all about sex for me though, my drive to make the Dominatrix Diaries is more about my passion for sharing interesting stories with the viewing public. As my interests change, so will my work. There are a few non-profit organizations that were instrumental in my development like Camp Rising Sun, The Posse Foundation and the Mavin Foundation that I’d really like to do a documentary about philanthropy. As a teenager it meant the world to me to know that those non-profit organizations believed in me.

Right now I’m focusing on developing a game show, a reality show and a short film of mine Rik Knotty Boy screened at the 2011 Fetish Film Festival in Germany. I’m currently shopping Dominatrix Diaries for major distribution and I really hope to find a way to show the complexity and importance of BDSM to mainstream America.

Chelsea Downs, director, as told to Danielle Young

Last 5 posts by Danielle Young

  • Stephen

    I’d love to know more about this, particularly Chelsea Downs’ love of adult babies. It was complete coincidence that I came across this article but it’s a fetish I happen to adore too.