Last night, I had the pleasure of participating in realizing a buddy’s dream. Fellow Californian Ariana Proehl, a non-profit exec by trade, was blessed with the idea to host a positive television show about smart ideas swirling around minority folk and on a cool Tuesday night in downtown New York, she did it! Producing her own project called “Know This With Ariana,” our girl not only hosted the show, but organized the panelists — myself, “America’s Next Top Model” veteran Yaya Dacosta, “Shit White Girls Say To Black Girls” funny girl Franchesca Ramsay, musician Muhsinah and DJ’s Tara and Jasmine Solano. The show was filmed live at the Beats By Dre store in New York and live-streamed on Knowthis.tv/live. T’was awesome and here is a bit of an uplifting pep talk from Ms. Proehl below. Get into it!
If you’re lucky, you find out who you are before you decide what you’re going to become. –Ruby Dee
Going through my fair share of b.s. relationships, low self-esteem struggles and life-purpose soul searching, at times it’s been easy to feel like a lost, hot mess. But I realized it was exactly all those moments of personal growth and opportunities for self-reflection — breakdowns and embarrassments included — that were opening me up to discover and evolve into the person I want to be. I realized that it was my knowledge of self that makes me strong, empowered, and well, sexy. Yep, I said it: your Knowledge of Self is Sexy. And here are ten reasons why:
1. When you walk into a room, people take notice. Your confidence from knowing who you are and what you’re about, precedes you.
2. You look sexy because you wear clothes that a) fit and b) reflect your personal style. You don’t follow trends for trends’ sake and aren’t trying to be somebody you’re not.
3. You have the dopest friends ever because when you know yourself, you attract others who know themselves and you get to have fun being confident, sexy smart-asses together.
4. You get to bust out the running man on a crowded street corner just because you feel like it and you really don’t give a f— about what another person might think. And really, what isn’t sexy about the running man? OK, don’t answer that. Just keep reading…
5. You’re spared the stress of worrying that every. little. thing. done and said by others is about you. You know that 99.2% of the time it’s a reflection of their business, not yours, and you keep it moving.
6. You know that being alone and being lonely are two different things. You don’t feel the need to cling to unhealthy relationships and aren’t afraid to have regular “me time.” In fact, you know it’s necessary to your personal growth and peace of mind.
7. You chase your dreams, not approval. (And can put that ego in check — rewind selecta! — when you realize you are chasing approval).
8. You practice forgiveness of yourself and others. You’re not trying to sink to the bottom and know that replaying the tape of past mistakes or carrying around hurt feelings is only dead weight.
9. You can let yourself break down, screaming ‘Mama, why??!’ while choke-crying on the floor when you need to without completely falling apart because you know something different and greater ultimately awaits.
10. You focus on your goals and don’t waste time tearing others down to boost your success. You recognize that there may be duplicate ideas in the world but there is no one, really no one, like you and that putting energy toward developing your unique gifts is where it’s at. There is no competition.
What knowledge of self makes you sexy? Add your comments to the list!
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