I admit it. I’m far from perfect. I have done quite a few things that I’m not proud of when it comes to the opposite sex. As an MC, I’ve gotten the chance to travel around the world and “meet” lots of women. Short, tall, white, black, classy, trashy; I’ve been there. Now while you’re doing you and having fun, you never stop to think about whether she has a man at home. Hell, what if she has a husband at home. All you’re thinking about is what you want. I know for a fact that I have dated a whole lot of chicks with men at home. I’m not saying I’m proud of it but those are just the casualties of war. If its not me, then it would be some other dude just like me. And this is the mentality men have until it’s their turn to be the cuckold. This brings me to the story of lost one.

Upon meeting a women, most men aren’t particular about how it happens. Sometimes it’s through a friend, other times she might come at you. Now, if she comes to you, you must have your ‘groupie-dar’ up because she’s probably just looking to get paid, or be seen. Honestly, I have no problem with groupies because at least you know the deal. It’s those damn down low groupies that piss me off, these women act like they don’t know you, and after you sleep together they start to recite your verses (via wikipedia). Every now and again you run across one who really knows how to keep it cool, and that can be a problem because you don’t know what type of woman you’re sporting around town.

Even before I started rapping, I have always tried to not get seriously involved with women who party too much during the week. In my opinion if you out on a Tuesday night then Wednesday you can’t be doing anything of too much importance, and if you’re not making your own money you damn sure ain’t gon’ be spending mine! Most times, groupies are easy to pick out of the crowd. They travel in packs, and they always know the party’s promoter. They are typically broke, but to the naked eye they seem financially stable because they’ve got a nice bag or some crazy shoes. Finally, they always find their way to the VIP; I don’t care who’s in the building they are in the mist of whatever bottles are popping.

I never really thought much of the attention I was getting from women. I was used to being approached while I was out, so I didn’t really see anything wrong with getting to know a girl who seemed pretty cool. And one night, I met a young lady that wasn’t impressed by my profession, she even turned the tables on me and made me persue her after awhile. Once we really started to hang out heavy I started to really like her and we began what was pretty much a relationship. It was when I started to travel that things got serious because I was flying her to see me wherever I was recording like twice a month. All the while she was going to work every day, paying her own bills and even buying me shit out the blue. When I was out of town, she would be crying about being bored and I’d suggest that she go out with friends.

Her: Nah, I’ll just talk to you while you’re recording.

That exchange made me feel like I could build a relationship with her because, at heart, I’m a homebody too!

One weekend, I didn’t have any sessions so I flew her out to LA see me and we went to the club. While there, she ran into a friend of hers who was with another artist. As she talked with her girl, I noticed that she also knew that particular artist but it wasn’t an immediate red flag because in Atlanta, where we’re from, everybody knows somebody. I knew dude so it wasn’t really a problem and I took her joking with him and his crew in stride. It wasn’t until we were leaving and she gave one of his entourage a hug that I began to take issue with the situation. Being the man I am I couldn’t bring myself to question her, but like any man in my position would, I joked with her about liking the entourage member. She quickly got serious with me and tried to put to rest any feelings I had about her and her actions.

By the time I came home to Atlanta, my girl’s frequency of going out had increased from just birthdays and work promotions to every other night. She said that she had more free time because her position at work had changed but I sensed that her outings really increased because her friends didn’t agree with our situation and were applying the pressure. Either way I didn’t really have a problem with her going out because I had a few other women I was seeing at the time as well.

Not long after she started partying more, things with us began to gradually fade. We saw less and less of each other and were arguing for the first time. I was losing interest by the day. We weren’t fighting about cheating, but more about our relationship’s dwindling trust because we weren’t seeing each other to know what the other was doing.

Now, I was cool because I had a new (better) situation coming to play and I assumed she had the same. But even though I wasn’t as interested in the situation, I still liked being with her, and for her birthday we went to Miami for the weekend. It was really like old times. We laughed and for the first time in months we didn’t argue, we were just cool all the way around. The trip went so well that when we got home I planned to cut my new piece off.

The following Friday we decided to go to the movies and get some dinner. She gave me her phone and told me to get the show times. When I picked up the phone I went into the phone book by mistake, and as soon as I stumbled in I got back out. But while I was in I ran across the name of a prominent R&B artist (that I also just so happened to know), so I went back to see if it was in fact his number. It was. I didn’t mean to find it but since I did I felt like I had to check her on it.

When I did, she said she met him at a club recently, they’d only talked once and it was innocent. Off top, she was in violation for even having the number in the first place, but I had no proof it was anything more. Still, it was enough to make me fall back and to this day she still won’t admit that it was anything more. I could never bring myself to ask him about the nature of their relationship, but looking back, I don’t think I cared enough about her to risk playing myself by asking.

-Southern Gentleman

If you like Southern Gentleman, check out the rest of his exploits here.

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