Who’s Gonna Pay For All These Kids?!?

Recession is the word. They say it’s hard out here for a pimp, but damnit what about a hardworking, underpaid father of two? It’s funny, I look at my mom and see how she and my dad raised four kids; then I look at my in-laws and see how they raised four kids— makes me wanna clap it up for the old school. There is no way in hell that wifey and I can financially manage four kids, assuming they all want to eat, wear clothes and be sheltered.

Times are definitely changing and being a parent just isn’t what it used to be. Both me and my wife work (her schedule is a set one, while I work ungodly hours a few nights a week) and even with both of our salaries it gets tough. Not only are gas prices at an all-time high, but childcare ain’t cheap either. Day care for my oldest and a sitter for the baby is damn near a second mortgage (yet I wouldn’t exactly feel comfortable paying bottom dollar either). Still, I remember as a kid, my dad went out and worked while we stayed home with ma dukes. My wife and I tried that for a few months, but once we were forced into a Ramen noodle diet, we figured it was time for her to go back to work.

What happened to the dream America sold us? You know the white picket fence? The 2.5 kids? Isn’t that what the old heads promised us after four years of college? Shit, now the only thing we got is shitty paying jobs, rising health care costs and college loans up the ass (am I just bitching?). Now I wouldn’t trade my kids for the world, please believe it, but I wouldn’t dare doubling up either. Imagine what college will cost in the year 2023?

I can’t front though, these tough financial times have forced the wife and I to get more creative on the parenting front. A year ago, a typical Saturday would consist of breakfast at Ihop, a music together class (yeah we were the only ‘spics in the building), lunch, maybe a trip to the movies or Chuck E. Cheese’s for dinner. Man are those days over. Now we do a lot more cooking at home and spend a lot more time in the park and in the library. Despite the declining U.S. dollar, our family works. How are the rest of you guys with kids copping these days? Can you picture yourself having any more kids in the new era of Brokeassness?

-Al “Brooklyn” Bundy

Want more Bundy? Check out his previous posts here.

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