We Used to Like John Mayer and…We Still Do

Weighing in on this issue is a big deal because we’re freelancers with deadlines, however when we saw our TwitterFeed, we had to chime in. John Mayer is a good songwriter/guitarist and a decent looking guy with an admirable tattoo arm sleeve. We do not however see him as a racist because he used the word “nigger” during a Playboy interview.

Brown people tend to like the guitarist, and rock fans don’t dismiss our enjoyment of him the way many do say, if we admitted we genuinely liked Coldplay. Mayer played at Michael Jackson’s funeral for pete’s sake. Here’s what he said that made the Internet angry:

PLAYBOY: If you didn’t know you, would you think you’re a douche bag?

MAYER: It depends on what I picked up. My two biggest hits are “Your Body Is a Wonderland” and “Daughters.” If you think those songs are pandering, then you’ll think I’m a douche bag. It’s like I come on very strong. I am a very…I’m just very. V-E-R-Y. And if you can’t handle very, then I’m a douche bag. But I think the world needs a little very. That’s why black people love me.

PLAYBOY: Because you’re very?

MAYER: Someone asked me the other day, “What does it feel like now to have a hood pass?” And by the way, it’s sort of a contradiction in terms, because if you really had a hood pass, you could call it a nigger pass. Why are you pulling a punch and calling it a hood pass if you really have a hood pass? But I said, “I can’t really have a hood pass. I’ve never walked into a restaurant, asked for a table and been told, ‘We’re full.’”

PLAYBOY: It is true; a lot of rappers love you. You recorded with Common and Kanye West, played live with Jay-Z.

MAYER: What is being black? It’s making the most of your life, not taking a single moment for granted. Taking something that’s seen as a struggle and making it work for you, or you’ll die inside. Not to say that my struggle is like the collective struggle of black America. But maybe my struggle is similar to one black dude’s.

PLAYBOY: Do black women throw themselves at you?

MAYER: I don’t think I open myself to it. My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock. I’m going to start dating separately from my dick.

PLAYBOY: Let’s put some names out there. Let’s get specific.

MAYER: I always thought Holly Robinson Peete was gorgeous. Every white dude loved Hilary from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. And Kerry Washington. She’s superhot, and she’s also white-girl crazy. Kerry Washington would break your heart like a white girl. Just all of a sudden she’d be like, “Yeah, I sucked his dick. Whatever.” And you’d be like, “What? We weren’t talking about that.” That’s what “Heartbreak Warfare” is all about, when a girl uses jealousy as a tactic.

To be fair, he’s right when he says that if a “hood pass” was indeed real, he could spout the word “nigger” but moreover, he’d be treated as a second class citizen in his public life. However, he admits that he hasn’t. Internet Strike One.

Internet Stike Two, he refers to his penis as David Duke, aka the longtime head of the domestic racial terrorist group the Ku Klux Klan. While the way he stated his dating preference isn’t ideal, how many of your girlfriends routinely say they wouldn’t “date a white boy because I just don’t like them.” As a friend might say, “my spirit just doesn’t take them.” While we are equal opportunity daters around these parts, everyone’s entitled to their own taste.

If these points are why we should begin boycotting John Mayer, then this is why we’re not upset with John Mayer. Sure he sounds a bit self-indulgent, but how can you not when a reporter is solely asking questions about you? Sure he doesn’t date black women, but isn’t dating white/other women why ESSENCE got reamed for that Reggie Bush cover?

ps. what the hey does “I’m very” mean? This…confuses us.

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