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HATED IT! – Nicki Minaj’s “Massive Attack” and Why We’re Wild Disappointed

Sigh…I knew as soon as I heard “Massive Attack” Sunday night this wouldn’t end well.

Nicki, what happened?

How did you go from “I Get Crazy” to “Massive Attack?” Drawing from your “Beam Me Up Scotty” mixtape, I know you love a good staccato beat and technically the single isn’t too much of a stretch from your previous work but the Missy Elliott-esque track is a just…not connecting with me and I’m a fan. I’m on your side! I like your music! But “Massive Attack” just makes me shake my head in disappointment.

Ironically, I heard you were releasing a clip for the song and I hoped that, like Rihanna, you could sling together a great visual that would help me like the less-than stellar musical interpretation of your talent better known as your first official single. But even the video doesn’t make sense.

Here are my questions:

What’s the cash for that Birdman hands you in the beginning of the clip and where’s he pointing?

Where are you going in the pink Lambo?

Amber Rose is in the clip and I can barely see what she’s wearing? The only thing fun about Kanye’s boo is her outfits and I couldn’t even see that? Boo.

Why are you in the forest?

I get that you’ve got a military theme going, but who are we fighting and how are the Bruk Up-lookalike twins supposed to make me think about anything except Busta Rhymes? And honestly, the guys look like they’re about to make out as soon as Hype points the camera elsewhere. #justsayin

Who is Sean Garret supposed to be and WHY DOES HE REFUSE TO WEAR A SHIRT?!? PS. I hear this song is really his fault as producer and writer?

On the positive side, I applaud the green hair scene, you look great and clearly the low starch-egg white-peddle bike combo is working for you. Still, I feel a way about all the butt shots you have in “Massive Attack,” I know men love it, but I guess I’ve never seen this side of you — literally — and I’d hoped you’d take a classier approach in communicating your crown as the sexiest rap bitch around. Leave the backshots to Trina please?

Finally, I know you like to make up words, but wtf is a ‘tum tum?’ I know this Tum Tum, but I’m assuming you’re not trying to shore up your Texas base.

Sincerely yours,

Hills

ps. watch the clip and judge for yourselves below folks. Am I wrong?



Last 5 posts by Hillary aka Steely D